I will tell you my story. When I decided to be in a couple, it was late, I said to myself "I want to meet someone with whom I will learn to love, therefore to love myself, in order to be able to love the other". It's quite an adventure. And when I met this person, I said to him "from the moment when it will not be any more fun, I leave, that means that I finished learning to love". In fact, the idea was that I was giving this as an indicator. If I don't have any pleasure, it means that I am no longer learning to love, I am no longer learning to be who I am in my insecurities, in my doubts, in my weaknesses, and I am no longer accepting the other in his or her difference.
So, what I invite you to do, if you are already in a couple or if you want to get into a couple, it will be interesting to check what the deep motivation is. Because being in a couple, among other things, means meeting the parts of ourselves that we have not yet integrated, the parts of ourselves that we do not like because, socially, we have been taught that these parts are not likeable. We are going to meet it in the other. The other will be there to help me see myself, to help me meet myself, to help me accept myself. The couple relationship is the relationship that makes you grow the most.
That's why, when it comes to interpersonal relationships, what I propose to my clients is really to make the decision to want to grow through their relationship. What do I want to learn about myself? How am I going to develop compassion for myself, open my arms to myself so that I can open my arms to the other person? Take a moment and clarify your motivation for being in a relationship.
Keep in mind that your life is your work. Make sure you make it a masterpiece by entering into a relationship for the right reason.